Sayonara 2017 & hola 2018!

Assalamualaikum dan hi!

Tiup habuk sikit fu fu fu

Lamanya tak membebel dekat sini kan? Today i feel a lot like myself so rajin sikit nk berceloteh. Anak2 pun behave dan kenyang dan bahagia so umi boleh malas2 sekejap. Happy new year! Dah 2018 dahh. Dan tahun ni bakal berumur 32 tahun dah tua dahh lol. 2017 was challenging dan fun! I cant think of anything i hate about last year. Alhamdulillah yg seronok2 je dalam memori ni. Huhu.

2017 was the year we utilise on being 4, my husband, zahra, muaz and i. Pegi sana sini, makan itu ini, berjumpa org mcm2 jenis, semua kami berempat bersama2. Yaya pergi korea sambung master. Other bro n sis sambung dip dan asasi. Ayah ibu mak abah atok nenek tok ayahsemua sihat dan kuat alhamdulillah ya Allah. Husband masih buat master, insyaAllah tahun ni 2018 habis. All good.

Towards the end of 2017 tu i had my awesome birthday. Dan like ada few weeks after dapat hadiah birthday yg surpriseee! Hehe another addition in our family. Seems like we'll be 5 this year. Getting bigger! Lol. Alhamdulillah i survived the morning sickness phase. I will probably tell you in excrutiating detail some other time about this 3rd pregnancy. All is good sekarang. Alhamdulillah sgt.

Entering 2018 was a bit of a hazy because of the morning sickness but im fine now. I had plan tau about what i were going to do. But Allah's plan is the greatest so was a bit lost. But now i think i know bit by bit what i will be doing throughout this year. I pray that Allah will always guide us. InsyaAllah.

So 2018 bring it on!

Ps: zahra wants a baby girl and i bet muaz wants a baby boy. Husband and i mcm tak kisah lah boy ke girl ke asal sihat walafiat. Just excited sape menang, adik ke kakak. Haha

I've been down the darkest alleys, saw the dark side of the moon

"Wolves"

In your eyes, there's a heavy blue
One to love, and one to lose
Sweet divine, a heavy truth
Water or wine, don't make me choose

I wanna feel the way that we did that summer night, night
Drunk on a feeling, alone with the stars in the sky

I've been running through the jungle
I've been running with the wolves
To get to you, to get to you
I've been down the darkest alleys
Saw the dark side of the moon
To get to you, to get to you
I've looked for love in every stranger
Took too much to ease the anger
All for you, yeah, all for you
I've been running through the jungle
I've been crying with the wolves
To get to you, to get to you, to get to you

To get to you
To get to you

Your fingertips trace my skin
To places I have never been
Blindly, I am following
Break down these walls and come on in

I wanna feel the way that we did that summer night, night
Drunk on a feeling, alone with the stars in the sky

I've been running through the jungle
I've been running with the wolves
To get to you, to get to you
I've been down the darkest alleys
Saw the dark side of the moon
To get to you, to get to you
I've looked for love in every stranger
Took too much to ease the anger
All for you, yeah, all for you
I've been running through the jungle
I've been crying with the wolves
To get to you, to get to you, to get to you

To get to you
To get to you

I've been running through the jungle
I've been running with the wolves
To get to you, to get to you
I've been down the darkest alleys
Saw the dark side of the moon
To get to you, to get to you
I've looked for love in every stranger
Took too much to ease the anger
All for you, yeah, all for you
I've been running through the jungle
I've been crying with the wolves
To get to you, to get to you, to get to you

WOLVES

ps: i got news. we got news. good news. ehehe

West Coast

assalamualaikum

hi

current earworm. 

West Coast - Lana Del Ray

Down on the West Coast they got a sayin'

"If you're not drinkin' then you're not playin'."

But you've got the music, you've got the music in you, don't you?

Down on the West Coast I get this feeling

Like it all could happen that's why I'm leaving

You for the moment, you for the moment, Boy Blue, yeah, you

Your flyin' high at the show, I'm feeling hot to the touch

You say you'll miss me the most, I say I'll miss you so much

But something keeps me really quiet, I'm alive, I'm a lush

Your love, your love, our love

I can see my baby swingin'

His Parliament's on fire and his hands are up

On the balcony and I'm singing

Ooh, baby, ooh, baby, I'm in love

I can see my sweet boy swayin'

He's crazy y Cubano como yo, my love

On the balcony and I'm saying

Move baby, move baby, I'm in love

I'm in love (I'm in love)

I'm in love (I'm in love)

Down on the West Coast, they got their icons

Their silver starlets, their Queens of Saigons

And you've got the music, you've got the music in you, don't you?

Down on the West Coast, they love their movies

Their golden gods, and rock and roll groupies

And you've got the music, you've got the music in you, don't you?

You push it hard, I pull away, I'm feeling hotter than fire

I guess that no one ever really made me feel that much higher

Te deseo, cariño, boy, it's you I desire

Your love, your love, our love

crown fixed

assalamualaikum

hi

i feel fat. no. i am fat. there. another usual statement right? my friends and family are actually tired of hearing that so you're next. lol. but when i say that to my husband that, he'd make a i-told-you-so-face and say "do something about it". since i can no longer blame muaz and breastfeeding, the reality is hitting me hard in the face. smack! but, im gonna enjoy my peanut butter sandwich and all ice cream i can get for now. im just glad im healthy. eher.

its monday guys! back to your usual in front of computer routine? or munching in front of the tv? im the second category i must say. and life is kind so far alhamdulillah. ahh see so much to be gratful for. why whine? 

so yesterday i was waiting for husband to take us out for weekend day out as per usual, but azrul insisted that i go out alone. i mean, all by myself. i have been so dependant on him, i wouldnt know what to do alone! so i asked maksu to accompany me, kill time and wonder around shopping. yes, i got shoes and boy oh boy padini is having a big sale until 17th of september you should go! what we did was, we went shopping, eating macaroons, sushi and cups and cups of tealive and juiceworks. i peed like 3 times there. and it was fun. my maksu is always there when i need her. she's this earth i need to channel out my negative feelings and thought as i am hers i hope. she left her kids to her husband, my paksu too. so, thank you paksu and my beloved husband for taking care of the kids, i heard you had a great time yourself bringing the kids to playground and blow bubbles. of course at the end of the day, i suddenly miss the kids and him as i saw many couple with kids, reminded me of my own, so i rushed home.

i must say, it is nice to get out once in a while with no kids and husband, just me and myself especially me being a stay-at-home-mother. and i am thankful i have a very considerate husband that he always look out for my mental health lol. but seriously, any mothers would love to go out with their friends and for a few minutes forget about life at home and actually focus on herself, what she wants to eat, instead of thinking about what other tiny humans to eat, walk at her pace, stop anywhere for how long she wants. and at this, the husband needs to be a considerate human being and see his partner as a human being who has needs to communicate with the outside world and do whatever she wishes. and my husband always let me go out do my things, in fact this is not the first time i went out with maksu or any of my friends. its just a few times in a year thing. most of the time of course lah i prefer to go out with my honey bunny kan buat ape pegi dengan orang lain. but its a nice gesture, good husbands would do that.

ok lah for today. im sort of still figuring things out with this mary kay thing im doing, but my kit arrived yesterday so im pretty enthusiastic who wouldnt right? i got a big box of skincare and makeup kot. its like a present i got from myself. ok ok that's it then byeeee.

wearing my thinking hat

assalamualaikum

hi

it is almost all the time that you feel like its certain. what you feel is real. what you're doing is real. but sometimes doubt creeps in. for a female, i guess its almost routine to feel that way, because hormones. and i am like that sometimes. i doubt myself. it is mostly out of nothing and once i let the steam off to my roommate slash husband, i feel better again. but it keeps coming back at me and i dont like that those doubts ruin my days, i thought i should do something about it. and i am. slowly but surely? hopefully.

i have registered myself in a small business i want to be serious about it. and i want to build my dream slowly one page at a time. it is at such moments that you realise that only you can pick yourself up. i mean, my friends are obviously jealous of me that my husband looks after us very carefully and with such love, no doubt about that. what im talking about is what i want to do for myself. because basically my husband cant do it for me. he's very supportive but i gotta stand up and do it myself. finally walking the talk. i hope i am strong enough. and i hope i dont give up. im a sucker for stumbling and crying and retreating. i really want to go for it and if it turned our horrible i hope i will stand by it and make it work no matter what.

haha that's very vague? im just secretive about it. its such a baby i dont want to ruin it. when the time comes. and oh. its not about the small business that im doing because the small business is mary kay and that's not my dream but ok. its something else. we'll see about that?

honestly i have been talking about this since forever, if you read this from the beginning haha. ugh, im so weak. lol

ok bye xoxo

dusk till dawn

ps: we're going to pontian tomorrow. ape best guys?